Tag Archives: Alejandro Jodoworsky

Jodorowsky’s Team: Phoenix Suns

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Noted Surrealist Film Director Alejandro Jodorowsky has provided notes to Ryan McDonough on how to get the most out of his players this off-season.

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Goran Dragic – “Open your fingers, they are made of birds.”

Alex Len – “You are a tragic pair of galoshes.”

Marcus Morris – “You are alone.”

Markieff Morris – “No, YOU are alone. I think?”

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Eric Bledsoe – “Cancel your plans, you’re a rocketship.”

Miles Plumlee – “Invert your heart, they are lungs.”

Isaiah Thomas – “Former Kings turn into legends. You are a living statue in the air.”

PJ Tucker – “A SUPER DUI? Really?”

Jeff Hornacek – “You are an extension of a bird wing on decline.”

 

 

Jodorowsky’s Team: Golden State Warriors

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Noted Surrealist Film Director Alejandro Jodorowsky has provided notes to Bob Myers on how to get the most out of his players this off-season.

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Steph Curry “There is no line like the lines in your hand. Cut off your hand to reach heaven.”

Klay Thompson “There is no maze in heaven, so follow the maze here on earth.”

David Lee“You are a concept in a rabbits eye.”

Andrew Bogut“There’s a factory that will build you exactly what you want, but only what you wanted a year ago.”

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Andre Iguodala“Captain Kirk! Ccccaaaapppttttaaaiiinnn Kiiiiirrrrkkkk!”

Harrison Barnes“You woke up water. You will never sleep again.”

Shaun Livingston“Open house. You are the center of a never used fireplace.”

Jermaine O’Neal“Sing in the theater in a backwards voice.”

 

Jodorowsky’s Team: Boston Celtics

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Noted Surrealist Film Director Alejandro Jodorowsky has provided notes to Danny Ainge on how to get the most out of his players this off-season.

Kelly Olynyk“Find a turtle, watch him give birth to the universe.”

Gerald Wallace“Become cardboard.”

Brandon Bass“Make a starfish your wife, wear her like a crown on your groin.”

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Avery Bradley “Find the monster, are you the monster? Find the mirror, are you the mirror? Monster-Mirror. Repeat.”

Tyler Zeller “Enjoy the fireworks of your mind, but do not set the fuse. You are the match.”

Rajon Rondo “Liberate your mystic self that you drowned as a child. Give him a balloon, watch him fly, then shoot the balloon.”

Marcus Smart“You were a cowboy. You are now an elbow.”

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